Fic commentary meme

[matrixrefugee]

Ganked from zekkass

Pick a paragraph (or any passage less than 500 words) from any fanfic I've written, and comment to this post with that selection. I will then give you a DVD commentary on that snippet: what I was thinking when I wrote it, why I wrote it in the first place, what's going on in the character's heads, why I chose certain words, what this moment means in the context of the rest of the fic, lots of awful puns, and anything else that you'd expect to find on a DVD commentary track.

Comments

[ladyneferankh.livejournal.com]

From Zenon Eyes III: I'm Beginning to See the Light (SPOILERS to any who haven't read! )

“What do you want of me?” he asked, dead voiced.
“I want you. I want you back.”
His lashes flicked, the closest he came to blinking. “I have wronged you.”
“I know. I should have explained what I wanted of you. I just want you back.”
“Why? Because I belong to you?”
“No, because you are you, because you’re unique. I can’t imagine life without you. I forgive you; I should have told you better what I wanted of you. Can you forgive me for treating you the way I did last night?”
“I suppose I can forgive. There was more to extenuate your feelings than there is to excuse my guilt. If you cast me off forever, if you shut me down, I deserved it for the way I handled your love. I should have thought of it.”
She looked deep into his eyes and saw contrition. She saw it so rarely on Orga faces she barely recognized it on a Mecha visage. She put her arms around him, taking him back. He slipped his free arm around her waist. His cheek brushed hers gently.
And a light went on in her head. If he had admitted his guilt, if he had assumed responsibility for it, then there was more to his actions than mere following his programming. He had evolved…he had developed that moral gyroscope in the human psyche that so many ignored or tried to silence.
"There is some thing I need to say to you if I have never said it before," he said.
"What? What is it?"
He paused, his eyes lowered. He looked her in the eye. “I love you, Serin.”
She sat up suddenly. “What did you say?”
“I said I love you.”
She held his face, covering the gash with her hand though her hand brushed the cold metal underneath. She deserved to feel it, she realized.
“I love you too.” She leaned down to hold him close again, but his arm blocked her.
“Are you saying this because you feel sorry for me or yourself?”
“I’m saying it because it’s the truth.”
“That is all I needed to know.” His arm relaxed and he drew her to himself.
Zipes and a few technicians came in at this point. Zipes motioned them to stay at the door.
“Serin, Joe, are you ready?” he asked.
Serin released her hold on Joe, but his free hand took her hand.
“I am,” she said.
“We are,” Joe added.
“It’s best if you came along, Serin,” Zipes said.
“I could bear it with you,” Joe said, looking at her. She said nothing as the techs bore him into a workroom. She could barely believe the light she saw kindling in his eyes, even as the men worked on him. In this light she saw something old consumed and something new take its place.