Depressed

The plan for the day was for the three of us to go to Salem. But then my mom had a crying jag out of the blue, so she told my dad and I to go without her... But we just couldn't. I was worried sick that something might happen to her while we were gone, plus I'd started feeling depressed myself, so we decided to wait till next week...

So now, I am trying to do what I would have done if we weren't going anyway, which is working on writing my current magnum opus... only to find the computer ate one of the files, which I'm trying to restore, but that's not working, so now I'm feeling worse than before. Never mind that I can't remember exactly what I wrote, so I can't even rewrite it, which is just making the depression escalate even more. I'm about ready to stop writing the damn thing and delete everything I've posted. I haven't had any feedback on it in a while and I just feel like I'm boring you all to death with it. The temptation to start begging for reviews like a tweenager on fanfiction.net is eating at me, but I'm not about to annoy you completely by doing that. If you want me to stop posting it and just save it for my own private consumption, just let me know.

Is it November already??

Just got the infamous "Too many connections" error message on the NaNoWriMo site as I was tooling around on it. I was about to ask for a little advice on who I should kill off at the climax of The Nephillim Variation, but I guess it will have to wait. Ah well.

I'm feeling a bit better than I did earlier: working on a scene involving the upper echelon of the Grigori, the Parzupheim, having a council meeting... which lead me to my first huge gaping plothole: It appears that Penume, the Grigori side/identity of Sabia Valiant, is/was a member of the Parzupheim, but has been removed from it, due to the fact that she's under Enniel's thumb and he's been keeping her true nature hidden from her and has done so for the better part of a hundred fifty years. The question is: why would the Parzupheim allow him to get away with this? (Aside from the fact that Enniel functions almost like a paranormal Mob boss -- cross that: he *IS* a paranormal Mob boss...) ( Cut for potential spoilers )