More Damned Movie madness

[matrixrefugee]

The Damned Movie premiered last night and it seems Ron Howard caught the fanbrat behavior bug from Dan Brown: he's using the ol' "DUN LIK DUN REED!!!11111" argument to those who are offended by it. Well, I don't intend to see it in the theatre, unless it's at the dollar theatre and I go see it with Mark, so the both of us can snark at it. I might even wait till it comes out on DVD and rent it from Blockbuster... and tape-record my MST3K-style snarkage. Kinda like what I'm going to do with that copy of the damn book that I ordered from Amazon.com (which still hasn't shown up yet... Betcha it comes the day the Damn Movie is released).

DATELINE: Cannes Film Festival --

The results are in, the critics have cracked the Damned Book Code. To quote a Boston Herald headline:

"IT STINKS!"

It seems the critics really tore into it. The general consensus has been "It's too long and too boring." They're down on the script for being weak, and down on the wig that got stuck on Tom Hanks. They're even ripping the casting director for signing on Audrey Tatou, because her English is difficult to understand. And the big crucial revelation.... was met with gales of laughter from the audience. One critic said, "If you want to see a movie about the Holy Grail, watch 'Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade'."

I think the critics would agree with my icon...

Comments

Lol!

[(Anonymous)]

Okay, I'd say hands off Audrey Tatou-- this is only her second English-speaking role, and in her first one she had to speak everything in a Turkish accent so she's learning-- but yeah...that wig. I've been puzzling over that wig. He looks like, cheez, I don't know, the clerk in a bookstore that only stocks pretentious anti-best sellers and various meditations on Foucault.

~Ruby

Re: Lol!

[matrixrefugee.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I thought that comment about her was a bit much. I just included it for thoroughness' sake.

And you're damn right about Tom Hanks's wig... unless they stuck that on him in a bid to make the character less of a Gary Stu. I'm no expert on hair, but my brain broke on seeing those early publicity shots of him.

[(Anonymous)]

"DUN LIK DUN REED!!!11111"

To which I'd reply, "how am I supposed to know if it sucks or not if I don't read it?" For the record I started reading my sister's copy since i wanted to see what all the fuss was about and never got past the first page.
~Weaver

[matrixrefugee.livejournal.com]

"how am I supposed to know if it sucks or not if I don't read it?"

You win at life, Weaver!

And I hear you about having trouble getting past the first page of the book. Now multiply that feeling by 450 (one for each page)! I have no idea how I managed to get through reading the bloody thing *twic*e.

[(Anonymous)]

You're a sublime masochist. Really, that has to be the only answer.

~Ruby

[madra-liath.livejournal.com]

I can't see The Da Vinci Code. I'd start laughing and shouting "It's not real!" every time they mention The Priory of Sion.