Between the good and bad, that's where you'll find me, Reaching for Heaven

I discovered that some of my tags had become pretty much just catch-alls for a particular topic, case in point the fanfiction tag, so I decided to start splitting it up. The main "fanfiction" tag is now mostly for actual fanfictions, while I've created the "fanfiction: notes" for posts where I'm talking about things I'm working on, and "fanfiction: theory and criticism" for when I'm posting about fanfiction as a form of literature. I may do the same with the "writing" tag, splitting it into "writing: original fic" and "writing: fanfiction". This should make it easier for anyone trying to find my actual fanfics. I'm also eliminating the "fanfics" tag and merging it with "fanfiction", since it's redundant.

The catch is, this is taking a while and I haven't been able to make a whole lot of progress on it, since last night my dad and I made an abortive attempt at getting the laptop I've been wanting/needing for some time. Turns out the rebate from Dell which we got only works if you're ordering from the website, and if I did that, the model I'm looking for would cost more than it did at Best Buy. So... we're going to ask my dad's friend "Dana", who's an expert at finding budget-priced laptops if he can find what I'm looking for.

The order went through, but it wasn't an easy go. Still. I deposited the treasurer's check into my debit/credit-card account, but when I went to pay for the comp, I couldn't get the money out of it, since they hadn't updated their system. So, I had to go the bank that just happened to be in the same shopping plaza as Staples, and get the money out. Whew. Slam dunk after that.

Then I come home from all that, and my mother comes home an hour afterwards (during which time I took a well-needed bath)... and we can't seem to find my father. He hadn't gone to work, and he was supposed to be going to Pennsylvania, but none of the cars had moved. I keep telling my mother we should contact missing persons (He does these disappearing acts when he's angry or depressed about something, and it scares me to no end, because I'm always afraid that one of these times, he's just going to leave and never come home, leaving us stranded financially. I can't work more than eighteen hours a week, or else I end up completely catatonic from stress, and neither can my mother).

I'm wondering if this computer I just ordered is cursed or something, because it seems to be bringing misery on this family...

::Edited to get rid of wangst::

Grrrr...

I was trying to pay for the new comp with a treasurer's check from the bank, but because it wasn't the exact amount, they couldn't take it. How was I supposed to know how much the darn thing was going to cost after tweaking?! I estimated it'd cost 1,500 (and I guessed close: the Oracle wasn't wrong that time), so I gave myself a cushion of a few extra hundred just to be safe, just in case it was more than that.

And the manager himself tells me he can't cash the check. I should have gotten pushy and said, "Hey, can't you give me a credit or something? I'm gonna be back here to get a printer/scanner in a month or so." Or better yet, gotten really bitchy and said, "Listen, you want the business or not? Because you're about to lose mine." They told me that the order would stay in the system for another 24 hours, and I could still pay for it, if I got a check for the right amount. Only trouble is, I have no way of doing that since I'm going into Lowell with my mother tomorrow morning, and I have to work tomorrow afternoon, *AND* my dad is going away to Pennsylvania for the weekend, so I can't do it tomorrow night.

Why can't something be easy for me, especially the big things, when the little things can be challenging for me? What is it that hates me? I *NEED* this computer, if I'm ever gonna get anything published, since my present rattletrap has so many problems. I need a bigger hard drive and more memory, in order to run a half-decent word processor and to be able to burn some stuff onto CDs (Oh yeah, I found out that the model I was looking at didn't have a 3.5 floppy drive, when I've got stuff stored on a bunch of 3.5's; the clerk at least had the deceny to tell us that they carry an external 3.5 drive, and that it's much more efficient to back stuff up on Flash drives, little removeable drives that you can just slip into a USB port. Man, am I out of the loop: the only time I'd ever seen one of those was in the movie "Collateral".).

::Sighs:: Better luck next time... It'll be just my dumb luck that they never have this particular model on sale again.

I've been emotionally numb all day, but at least I'm up and about and taking care of the usual. Sorry if I spooked anyone last night: I just over-reacted to something. I've just had too many negatives/too much bad news/seen too many horrors this year, and it's really starting to get to me.

Let's hope the computer-buying idea works out. So far so good: my folks and I went up to the Apple Store at the Rockingham Mall this evening, just to get a look-see around. I twiddled with one of the iMacs there: I like it already! The taskbar at the top makes me a little nervous, since I'm so used to it being down the bottom of the screen -- and the fact that one of the spyware bugs that killed my comp before was eating the taskbar also has something to do with that reaction. But I *LOVE* all those little icons down the bottom of the screen, and I love the feel of this machine! I haven't made the move to buy it just yet, but I did buy David Pogue's book on OS X Tiger, to help myself learn more about this thing I'm getting into. Hopefully sometime next week or the week after we can get the ball rolling on this. According to one of the techs there, I'll have to up the memory to a gigabyte if I'm gonna run VirtualPC and load the MxO into that... or maybe we can hope the MxO software gets revised for Macs (I *did* buy the PC version of the software, though I suppose I could sell that on Amazon.com if it came to that).

I'm also going to be switching ISPs again, once I get the machine: I'm going to be using CompuServe. It costs more than Juno, but it's less than AOHell, and they gotta be good if they've been in the business for as long as they have. I'll let you all know before the change goes through. I might be offline for a few days while I get used to the new machine, et al. Consider it a vacation from the 'Net: but it might not be easy for me, considering how much my online life means to me right now. Eh, I'll manage, same way I did when the spyware invasion happened and I got knocked offline for the better part of two weeks (three weeks? ::trying to remember:: )

I nipped up to the library here in town today, to take care of a few computer-related things (Didn't get as many of them done as I wanted to, since I wanted to get back early since it was warm today, and I didn't know how soon the bus would come: I ended up missing it anyway, and had to wait for the next one...). Plus, I also took out "The Macintosh Bible", as prepartion for getting the eMac: it's a great book, but it's a classic case of More Than Enough Information. I think I'd better find a recent version of "Macs for Dummies" or something like it: I might nip into Lowell Thursday and see if I can find it at the library there.

And someone please tell me that you **can** run WinDoze-based gaming software on VirtualPC. Because otherwise, I'm back at square one in terms of getting into the MxO, according to "The Macintosh Bible".

And I got back to editing "Motion to Deactivate", preparatory to *trying* to publish it via Lulu.com. I should take a stab at "Sophisticated Ladies", too, get that on there in time for Hallowe'en. My next thought was that once it gets cool again, I should talk to my mom about doing an "author photo shoot". The headshot I got on my Lulu.com page isn't very good. Only trouble is, all we have is analog cameras, and I need a digital one, to be able to actually upload the picture. ::Sighs::

Watched the premiere episode of "Supernatural" on the WB: It's like they're trying to rehash the supernatural detective/demon-hunter shtick from "Constantine" for the small screen, and they're failing horribly (though for some reason, the older of the two spook-chasing brothers reminds me of the blond, British version of John Constantine: He's got the same sort of "rake at the gates of hell" charm, but he's got nowhere near half the panache). The demon-hunter gave the show two thumbs waaaay down, to quote him: "Hunting spooks without being warded? No holy water, no blessed medals, no exorcism salt, no binding chants, not a word of the Ritualis, and I bet you five bucks the shells in those fuckin' shotguns those kids are totin' ain't made of blessed silver. Ten bucks says they don't know a damn word of Latin. Betcha twenty they couldn't tell a soldier demon from a sock." Me in reply: "Why do I see you crossing paths with those two and taking their kills from them, just to tick them off... besides the fact that they're in the same neck of the woods?" He came back with, "They're inept, and nosy kids drive me nuts."

And This Article Here should be required reading for the fanbrats who insist on writing Mpreg fics.

I spent much of the day resting and reading the manual for the MxO software (Note to the idiotic reviewers who claimed it "doesn't give you any time to learn the game": Did you think to read the frockin' manual?! Yeesh.). There's a reason for this, besides semi-wishful thinking: As of now, I'm looking at Dell computers and trying to decide which one would be the best. Their Dimension 4700 looks like it might work.

( Note to DegSep'ers )

In the meantime, I managed to get myself horribly addicted to this one little Flash game on miniclip.com, "The Pharoah's Tomb", which is a tricky little maze/adventure game where you have to guide this little Indiana Jones-type explorer (whom I personally dubbed "Illinois Brown") through a maze of passages and spiky-traps and monsters, while trying to collect all the little ankhs and things which open new doors and passageways... and try to stay alive long enough to escape. It's tricky: it requires a lot of really tight keystrokes with the arrow keys. I keep getting horribly killed by the monsters, which is kinda not great for my morale. I'm afraid I never really grew up with videogames, which kinda makes me a little nervous, considering what I have on my personal agenda... I hope I don't regret this...